Sunday, July 19, 2009

Up, Up And Away On Those Pregnancy Hormones

(Title of this blog post sung to the tune of Up, Up and Away in my Beautiful Balloon by the 5th Dimension.)

Congratulations, you are pregnant. Welcome to a world of chaos and responsibility. Those raging hormones are taking you higher and higher, to the land of designing the nursery, to the joys of all the baby showers. All those cute baby clothes and gadgets, you can never have too many things absolutely necessary for the proper care of your baby. Higher and higher you rise, then you hit the ceiling. In the meantime the rest of your body is suffering from exhaustion, morning sickness, heartburn, fluid build-up, constipation, hemorrhoids, bladder pressure and sleepless nights. On top of all of this you also feel unattractive, even though you have never looked more beautiful.

For no reason whatsoever you will complain, scream, yell and cry. This behavior defines who you are for the last three months of your pregnancy. Expectant dad, please be patient and understand that this is a very difficult time in a woman's life. It is also important to know that this too is a "training" period (refer to definitions in a previous post) for the years ahead.

Special thought: You will come to refer to this period of time as some of the best days of your life.

Additional items to be purchased during this period:
Paint for the baby's room, nursery furniture, those cute little alphabet letters for the wall, stroller, car seat, bottles, layettes, booties, books on parenting, onesies, mobile, diapers, swing, monitor, thermometer, hooded towels, nursing pads, breast pump/formula, sleep and play, bouncer, changing pads, wipes, baby toiletries and Rolaids. There are also those additional medical expenses not covered by your insurance. Refer to my definition of "money".

(Ending blog singing "livin on love, buying on time ...." by Alan Jackson)

1 comment:

  1. Jackie, I love it & can't wait to see what you come up with next. Take care, & may God bless you & your family! :)